The 5 Myths That Are Destroying Your Relationship

Uncategorized Nov 12, 2019

Do you feel a lack of intimacy and closeness with your partner? Maybe you aren’t having sex anymore and feel like you’re roommates rather than lovers. You haven’t felt that spark in awhile. Sex feels like a chore when you do have it, and sometimes you have crazy anxiety or dread beforehand, because you just can’t get as excited as you used to, and don’t want your partner to notice.

Or maybe you’re fighting all the time and you feel so much anger, you don’t know where it’s all coming from, but you do know that it’s hard to control. You just can’t forgive their past mistakes.

You really want to move forward from the past and heal your relationship, but it’s just so hard. How do you even do that?

Lots of people give all kinds of advice, and most of it is wrong. Read on while I bust some myths and help you get your relationship, and yourself, back on track.

 Myth 1 - You Just Need Marriage Counselling or Therapy

Here’s the thing: counselling and therapy doesn’t work. It doesn’t take away the problem. I see hundreds of clients who have spent years, and thousands of dollars on therapy, and they don’t feel any better.

Your brain is wired to make the bad things big. The more you talk about the problem, and all the bad things, the bigger they get. And the deeper the patterns in your brain get, that keep the negative cycle going,  The problem not only continues, but those patterns dig deeper and deeper into your brain. What you need is a solution that gets you results, and takes away the problem.

Myth #2- You’re Bad In Bed

Sexual problems happen to lots of people. To me, it’s just a sign that there’s a deeper, root problem that needs to be addressed. Once we find the real problem, we can work to eliminate it, and it goes away. It was just a symptom of something deep within your unconscious mind that needed sorting out. You are not bad in bed, and no matter what you’ve been told, you don’t need a pill or a potion or strategies. You can absolutely fix it.

3. It’s So Hard and So Much Work and Takes So Long

I know we really really want to change the people around us. If only my wife would come back. My husband has to love me again. I heed my wife to change. The thing is, we can only change ourselves. But once we do, a whole amazing world opens up to us. When we take back our own power, and make changes from within and are able to let go of all the past junk, we can think and see with clarity, Also, when we change the energy we project changes, and often people around us seem to change. They are really just responding differently to the new you. So, by changing yourself, it’s often possible to change those around us!

Myth #4- Anger is Your Problem

Lots of people who I work with think they have Anger Management Issues. They don’t. Anger is an easy “go-to” for many people, but it’s rarely anger. Anger often masks other emotions like sadness, hurt or guilt. It is possible to release this emotion and actually feel the real emotions that are underneath. This gives you ultimate control over what you feel and how you behave. Imagine if you could choose to NOT feel angry, but to feel kindness, or compassion or gratitude. Imagine your life if you could choose your emotions, and not be at the mercy of anyone or anything!

Myth #5 - It’s Someone Else’s Fault

It is always your fault. Read that again. Now I say this without any blame or judgement. If you can only change and control yourself, how can any situation be someone else’s fault? When you start to assign blame, although if feels easier, it actually robs you of your power. Blame keeps us trapped and doesn’t allow us to take responsibility and ownership over our lives. How much more empowering does it feel to be able to step back from a situation, see your role and learn from it? To see what you could do differently next time. THAT is powerful.

These myths keep us trapped in our negative patterns, emotions and events. If you want help moving through the change you want in your life, book a call with me here.


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